Ten (10) Tips On How to Handle Rumours about Yourself
One of the worst things ever, especially in school and workplace, is having to deal with rumours about yourself. One thing I’ve learned over the years is that no matter how “popular” you are or not, you will have to deal with at least one nasty rumours about yourself. Rumours happen to all of us, and even when they’re not that bad, they’re still horrible.
Since I know a lot of you have to go through the same thing, I put some tips together so you can get through this rough time with grace and maturity – unlike the people spreading the rumours. Here are 10 tips on how to deal with rumours about yourself:
1 .Ignore As Much As You Can
When you hear a rumours about yourself, one of the first things you should do is try to ignore it. Sometimes, if you ignore something like this, it goes away. It also shows that you’re above the rumours, and if you show that you don’t care, other people will stop caring.
2. Don’t Deny Too Hard
Whether the rumours is true or not, our first instinct is to defend ourselves. This is understandable, but defending yourself too much will make you look guilty, even if the rumours is completely false. Instead of running around yelling at everyone that it isn’t true, or writing about it on social media, ignore it (like I said before). Or, if you’re asked about it, simply say, “No. That’s not true.” And leave it at that.
3. Make People Feel Stupid for Talking About It
Go a step further than just simply saying, “No.” Make people feel stupid for even bringing up the rumours, or for believing it in the first place. You can do this by laughing it off and acting like it’s the silliest thing you’ve ever heard that you also don’t care about. For example, if someone asks you if it’s true, laugh casually and say, “Um, no. That’s not true.” Roll your eyes and then change the subject like it was never brought up. Blowing it off like this will make some people feel really silly for even thinking it could be true.
4. Stay Calm and Don’t Let Them See Your Reaction
Part of ignoring a rumours is to not let other people see how upset or angry it is making you. Again, seeming too defensive and angry will make you look guilty. Crying about it isn’t going to make others feel bad – it’s just going to add fuel to the fire. People can be really mean. They want to see you react, because they want to watch the drama. Don’t give them that satisfaction! Instead, blow it off, like I said before. If they don’t get the reaction they’re looking for, they will eventually stop. If they do? They’ll keep going.
5. Confront the Person Who Started the Rumour
If you find out who started this rumour, say something to them! It’s probably better to do this privately than publicly, as that can get messy and just make people talk even more. Confront the person in a calm manner, and say, “Why would you say something like that?” Make it clear that you’re angry, but also show that you’re the mature one here. Find out what their problem is and try to get to the bottom of things from there.
6. Lean on Your Friends
Dealing with rumours can be tough. Don’t feel like you have to go through this alone – lean on your closest friends for comfort. We don’t always feel comfortable going to our parents for this kind of thing, so instead, go to your besties. Talk to them, vent to them when you’re angry, and cry to them when you’re upset about it. Let them help you feel better.
7. Don’t Plot Revenge
I know that sometimes it’s tempting to fight fire with fire – or, in other words, start a new rumour to battle the one about you. But don’t do this. It’s immature, and you shouldn’t stoop to that level. The best revenge is continuing to live your life by acting like nothing is bothering you. Trust me.
8. Stand Up for Yourself When Necessary
I know I just spent this entire time telling you guys to ignore the rumours, but sometimes you just need to stand up for yourself. If things get out of hand and people are being really horrible, don’t be afraid to defend yourself. Don’t do this by whining “it’s not true!” or crying. Do it by acting assertive and in control, and saying something like, “This is getting ridiculous and needs to stop. I really don’t appreciate what’s going on.”
9. Talk to an Authority Figure If Needed
If things get really out of control, you should definitely consult an authority figure, like a teacher, guidance counsellor, or parent. If people are harassing you, that’s not okay. You should feel safe in school or work, or wherever the rumour is happening. Don’t be afraid to fill someone else in. They may have more power than you do to stop it.
10. Accept That There May Be Nothing You Can Do
The worst thing about rumours is that sometimes, there is nothing we can do to stop them. Most of the time you need to just ride them out and wait for people to get bored, or find something else to talk about. I know it sucks, but sometimes it’s best to just accept that and try to ignore and move on. It will give you a better piece of mind.